We’re big fans of 3D movies, and there’s a boat load of them every year now. We wish some earlier movies would have been in 3D like The Silence of the Lambs. (BTW, we’ve compiled a list of creepy Photoshopped movie scenes that includes Dr. Lecter.) How creepy would the “lotion in the basket” scene be in the third dimension? Even awkward celebrity interviews would be entertaining in 3D. Pixar and a number of other studios get 3D right. But over the years, there have been some big screen stinkers in 3D. Here are the 6 Worst 3D Movies Ever.
6. Friday the 13th: Part 3: 3D
A good 3D movie is one that can be seen with or without 3D glasses. This movie isn’t one of them. And it brings us to this entry in IMBD: Title 18, Code 1030, Subparagraph G of the United States Code: “It is hereby ordained that any and all motion pictures titled with the Roman numeral ‘III’ or the Arabic numeral ’3,’ including but not limited to those motion pictures that are third in a series of motion pictures, must be shot in 3D. Furthermore, all such motion pictures, when they are released on video cassette, shall bear a disclaimer on the box stating “Home Video Version Not In 3D.”
5. Jaws 3D
For one generation, this was their first 3D movie. There was so much excitement about finally seeing a 3D movie on the big screen. But it was a bigger disappointment than Jaws 4. This 3D flick had nearly none of the major actors from the previous Jaws movies. Nothing really flew out of the screen. Sharks — or tuna for that matter — aren’t that exciting when it comes to 3D. Give me a movie about a stabbing murderer. Then you’ve got some nice 3D slicing motions.
4. Amityville 3-D
The movie was originally titled Lame Sequel. When they finished “writing” the script for this movie, they forgot all about including a storyline. Amytyville 3D did not deliver any extra dimension except it took you to another dimension of boredom. 3D has changed over the years, and we suspect the producers read the script and said “How can we save this terrible movie? Wait, let’s put this crap in 3D.” Actual crap flying out of the screen in 3D would have been more entertaining.
3. Spy Kid 3D: Game Over
Four words: Sylvester Stallone in 3D. This was by far the worst movie in 2003. Writer-director Robert Rodriguez completely stopped trying with this movie. Even the deep talent of Antonio Banderas couldn’t save the film. Spy Kids 3-D: Game Over used the inferior anaglyph system. It uses red and blue lenses in those cardboard glasses. Basically, you end up with a headache with the 3D effects and it looks like you’ve watched the entire movie through glasses smeared with Vaseline.
2. Hannah Montana & Miley Cyrus: Best of Both Worlds Concert in Disney Digital 3D
Hannah Montana fans came out in droves to see this concert movie, and that included creepy older guys. This movie would have been even more popular if it featured Miley doing some more naughty poses that got her in trouble. No need for some cheesy 3D for a concert movie. Save 3D for the right types of movies: yes, we’re talking about porn.
1. Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience
What could be more annoying than watching a movie about The Jonas Brothers? Watching it in 3D! What does this tell you about their music? In order to make a feature film about a music concert, the last thing producers wanted moviegoers to focus on was the music and the singing. And it didn’t even do that well at the box office. The 3D glasses helped you see their ability to suck come right off the screen. This might as well have been Milli Vanilli: The 3D Concert Experience. That would have actually been better.
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